How to change your belief systems. Who decides
your destiny and your fate.
This question has always fascinated me. Is there someone who decides our destiny and our fate? How true is this phrase: “change your belief systems and create a new destiny.”
Often when I see my life or that of people around me, my mind always raises a question. How come one person is more successful than another one although the first person is honest and works so hard, while the other person is a lazy crook. He gives more than 100% to everything, yet he is still not successful.
Also, why one person is very poor while the other is wealthy? Or why someone is very healthy, while another one is ill since childhood?
So who decides all these? Who decides your destiny and your fate? When you don’t get what you want, who is responsible for that?
There are two thoughts or belief systems that pop up into the mind. We have been hearing about these two beliefs since our childhood.
The first belief is that God writes our destiny. He decides everything. The whole world works according to God’s wish.
The second belief system is that as is our karma (action, work, deed), so will be our destiny. We have heard about both of these belief systems since childhood and they are present in every religion.
- 1st belief: “Everything is happening according to God’s will”.
- 2nd belief: “As you sow, so you reap”.
How can both be true?
Comparing the 2 belief systems
So, let’s check the first belief system: “everything is happening according to God’s will.” Right now, let’s imagine God is in front of you. And you tell him that whatever is happening in your life is according to his will. So you have given him that power – as God. Because of his will, you sit, stand, walk and eat. It is all as per his will.
The second belief system is: whatever is your karma, you are getting fruits accordingly. In this case, you have no role to play.
But both these belief systems are so contradictory and different. In the first one, the entire control is with God. Everything is happening as per his will. Whereas in the second one, you are in control of everything.
The wonderful part is that since childhood we have been hearing about both of these belief systems. But we have never taken it too seriously. This subject was never of any interest to most of us. But now is the time to do a reality check.
Let’s go a little deeper and try to understand these two phenomena.
When something goes wrong in your life, you mostly accept that God is writing your destiny. You say that it was his will.
But you also believe in karma. Sometimes old people say that his destiny is good because his karma was good. Maybe he did something good in his past life.
So, these two belief systems are going on the whole day. It is very important that you listen to your belief systems. But how can you accept two contradictory beliefs? The mind did not even question them. How can both of them be true?
The belief system can be compared to a computer running an operating system. Whether you are using Windows or Mac, the operating system is very powerful. Without it, the computer will not work. Also, you cannot run two operating systems on a single computer as this will result in a conflicting situation. However, you need to upgrade the system frequently.
Human beings need clarity
Similarly, human beings also need clarity. We need to check our belief systems time and again. This is because as time changes, so do our situations. So, we need to check our system every now and then.
Our belief system (thought, feelings, attitude, action, habit, personality) creates our destiny. If we live our life holding onto a wrong belief system, it will directly impact our destiny. That is why checking our belief system is very important.
As is the belief so will be the destiny. So whatever is my belief system, all my thoughts will be based on that.
For example, we commonly say that anger is necessary. This is inscribed in our belief system. Now, suppose you create a thought: “Today I will speak nicely and politely, with love. I want to use peace in all my interactions.”
But this won’t happen. It just cannot happen. You first have to change your belief system. You cannot change the thoughts. Even if you try to change the thoughts only, you may be successful once but the second time you will still get angry. You don’t know since when you have these beliefs. Maybe you have it since childhood, or maybe for many lifetimes. It won’t go so easily because the belief system is like programming.
But the good news is that you can definitely change it. It will take a new belief system to overwrite the older one. You have been living with the old system for a long time. Your destiny is the aftermath of the old belief system.
Now, let us keep the old belief aside for a few days. We will now follow a new belief system. Note that we cannot follow both of them simultaneously as they cannot go in parallel. The reason being that the old belief is very strong. It will overrun the new one.
For example, if I said that anger is necessary, and now I am saying that being polite gets the work done. Then I cannot run both of the opposite beliefs in parallel. We will take a new belief system and experiment with it.
If my work gets done well, then my relationship starts getting better. I start feeling light. Then, I will say that this belief system is better. At that time I will get rid of the old one.
But suppose I experimented with the new belief system but I did not feel nice using it. This can also happen. If I got the right result, I will say: love works for me. But if I do not get the desired result, I will say, “No, I cannot do this. The earlier belief works better for me.”
This is spirituality. Spirituality means experimentation.
There are so many belief systems we use throughout the day. For example, when a small child is learning to walk and suppose he trips against a chair or any other object. Now, there are two different ways to deal with this situation.
The first way is to get angry with the child and scold him.
The second belief system is to console the child. It’s not advisable to teach him that it was his mistake while walking. We just hit the chair and blame it for hurting the child. We even ask for the chair to be removed from its original place so that the child feels better. Also, we tell the child that it’s not his fault. This behaviour of ours will increase the self-confidence of the child.
So what you would have done if you were confronted with such a situation? The answer is simple. It all depends on your belief system.
Here is another example of transmitting our belief systems. A child has no idea about competition and comparison. Who taught him all that? The parents tell the child that he has to be first in class, ahead of everyone. No one tells the child that his own performance matters most. They say the child has to be in competition with other people.
When the same child comes back home after an exam, the mother asks: “How did it go? How was the paper? How have other students performed? If the child answered that he did better than his friends, then this will satisfy the mother. But if he did worst than his friends, then the mother will not be happy. She will compare her child’s performance with that of the other students.
Unfortunately, this is the belief systems that we are teaching our children.
All these things are having an effect on your destiny. Today your destiny has jealousy, hatred, sadness, anger, remorse. There is an inferiority complex that other people are better than you are. Nobody ever created this belief system in you that “you are a unique soul.” Nobody taught you that your qualities are purity, peace, divinity and love. Everything else is only skills and talents. But they accepted your skills and talents as your identity. Your marks in the exams were taken for your identity. Your degrees and your professions were mistaken for your identity. The truth is you were not told about values and principles.
So it’s time to dig deeper and deal with your belief systems and create a new destiny.